FOR those of us who can no longer – like our parents before us – afford a social life, Friday nights are, 80s-style, planted in front of The Late Late Show.
the only difference is that many of us are now tweeting friends online while watching and drinking copious amounts of cheap wine – really, that eases the pain.
A segment of Late Late from last weekend really could have been – should have been – aired around 1983. Its title was “The Model and the Feminist,” and when writer Caitlin Moran planted her round ass next to it. the long sylph who’s our Rosie, I tweeted, “Ahh, is that what we’re keeping Rosanna for? They’re hoping for a catfight.”
If that had been the plan, the production team would have been very disappointed.
Davison had just finished an interview with Tubridy about her decision to pose topless for Playboy.
Now in the ’80s that might have been news, as Playboy was banned in Ireland at the time and topless swimming was not very common in Brittas Bay. There probably would have been hordes of righteous Catholic patriots tuned in to RTE hoping to catch a glimpse of a breast with maybe (Oh, do you control Nora!) Meanwhile, they were shaking their heads, pinching their heads. lips and wondered where the country was, at all, at all. Hopefully the priest would ‘read’ it on the altar on Sunday! Of course, thousands of people would ask their parents in England to send them a copy – or two; just for research purposes.
Which, strangely enough, was exactly what Tubridy said when he – tah-dah – produced the offending German copy of Playboy that Rosanna took off her top for. He had already warned audiences that there would be “nude pictures” during this part of the show – presumably for those of us who don’t have human bodies and who might be shocked to find out that women do. breasts. Or, more likely, for those of us who have boobs and are devastated that they don’t look like Davison’s.
Enthusiastically browsing Rosie’s snaps in her panties, pursed lips and shaking head, Tubridy hilariously looked like a cross between Father Dougal and Archbishop John Charles McQuaid.
Rosanna presented the very relevant central argument of feminism; the all importance of a woman being totally in control. She had been asked to do Playboy two years earlier but refused because she had not had an agent in Germany and would not have been fully responsible for the set, the footage used, the atmosphere and the content of the film. ‘together. . This time, she was in command of all the shots and was completely responsible for every aspect. A great example of how to teach young women the difference between using your body yourself and letting others use it for you.
But Tubs was doing another interview, one that would have wowed our ’80s audience who didn’t care about nuances of feminist power and were more interested in Rosie’s moral standards, her perceived disrespect – not just her own body. precious, but also that of all women.
In the style of a single, elderly, single uncle, Tubridy sadly asked Rosanna, “What message does this send? She played along, agreeing that yes it was a slippery slope and that she would probably end up becoming a nudist granny at 70.
Still no shame, no apologies, no, “Bless me Ryan for I have sinned”, so Tubridy struck the killing blow.
What did your father think about it? (Full support.) Your mother? (Full support.) Your boyfriend? (Full support.) Yawn …
He just stopped before inquiring into the local milkman’s hurt feelings of having to endure topless photos of Rosie – which aren’t even on sale in Ireland – while continuing, to Rosanna’s obvious surprise, flipping through the photos of her, he seemed fascinated, for, um, for research purposes only of course.
At this point, I was about to log off, but latched onto to hear the fabulous Caitlin Moran, a feminist whose ‘tell it-it-as-it-is’ stories of her sexual exploits would make Berlusconi blush.
Poor Tubs didn’t know what to do with her either. When it was clear that she wasn’t going to attack another woman just because it seemed like her male host expected, he gave up.
And so we never had the secret of his evening with Lady Gaga in a sex club in Berlin (“Do you know Eyes Wide Shut? That’s how it is,” Gaga enthused). We haven’t heard of the abortion she had following the birth of her two children, or why she thinks “women have really been ripped off just because men love them”, or even why she hates strip clubs but loves burlesque – – for the exact same reason Rosanna only got naked when she was in total control, in case you were interested.
There could have been a fabulous debate between two different types of women, both feminists who carry the cards. Could have been awesome! But it was not. Apparently, the debate that evening was to be limited to:
“Ohhh, listen, Rosie stuck out her breasts – what a shame!”
Followed by: “Mrs. Feminist, isn’t it terrible what Rosie is doing to the fellowship by removing her breasts?”
And all the time in between showing pictures of – you guessed it: Rosie with her tits out.
It’s not just RTE that is dedicated to covering stories about how humiliating it is to cover stories of sex, breasts, naked bodies etc … while recycling those same stories in titillating, hypocritical details, lascivious.
Recently in the Official Journal I read a column by a high profile and well respected journalist about The Daily Star posting these pictures of Kate Middleton breasts. The next day, his fellow scholar, also middle aged, wrote on the same topic. It was the third column of the week devoted to pictures of Kate’s breasts. In the public interest of course.
It’s called having your cake, etc …
The 80s may be over, but the sexual hypocrisy that raged during that decade continues …